state of affairs

Deviation Actions

dietcocaine

Published: Dec 21, 2014

160 Views

Literature Text

i don't let myself think about her -- that's how i get by. (guilt can only creep in if you forget to shove a towel under the crack in the door but i'm losing sleep and smoking too many cigarettes, until my lungs won't expand any more) i thought i'd seen enough blood to last a lifetime but i can't stop biting at my lips until they bleed, tearing off scabs to see if i'm still red inside. (years ago, she and i made a pact to always be blood sisters.) it's her second trimester now: i've come to understand that you will never leave her for me because she will give you what i could not. i've learned this of myself: i am not a good person. please, i wish that someone would pry open my ribs with a crowbar and stab my traitor's heart.